Square dancing means reliable fun, exercise and easy companionship to me. Through square dancing I have found a few close friends, and I also value my many, many casual friends who are dancers. Most are people I would not likely have met except through the Foggy City Dancers. I am a bit of an introvert, and I am not particularly comfortable with small talk, but getting acquainted gradually over months of dancing has been easy and comfortable. I particularly enjoy gay square dancing because it’s not complicated or awkward to find a dance partner; everyone finds a place in a square without concern about egos or romantic implications. When I’ve been feeling lonely or isolated, I look forward to good company at the weekly club dance.

Shortly after I started square dancing I was diagnosed with cancer, had surgery, and began many months of chemotherapy. The square dancers were very kind, accepting my occasional lapses of memory, my sore arm, and my bald head without making me feel I was a conspicuous inconvenience to them. In fact, the weekly square dance club was the only social context where I felt comfortable with my cumbersome head coverings and my face swollen from steroids. Even now I must take drugs that give me hot flashes and I’m often ridiculously hot and sweaty, but I feel accepted as a dancer.

My life is richer because of the diversity of my square dance friends, but especially so because dance styling is an opportunity to show our more eccentric and playful selves. I find the welcoming and accepting atmosphere at our parties and fly-ins particularly remarkable. Where else can I have instant acceptance into a “fun crowd” without a date, for very little money, and without the crutch of alcohol? Even when the food is very tempting, and it often is, I can dance off a few extra calories.